Oops, I Vacuumed the Snake

This is the conversation Holden and I had on the way home from school:

Holden: Ian has the hugest fish tank in the world because he has lots of fish. Its so awesome. He has every kind of pet you can have. He has dogs and a cat and lots of fish.

Me: Does he have a bird?

Holden: Oh. No.

Me: Hedgehog? Mouse? Rat? Hamster? Iguana? Ferret?

Holden: Oh , I forgot about those pets.

Me: Snake?

Holden: Aww, that would be so cool. Can I get a snake?

Me: No.

Holden: Pleeease? Why can't I have a snake? I really want a snake!

Me: You can't have a snake because I might vacuum it up by accident. I might suck it up into the vacuum hose.

Holden: I will keep it in a tank, like the fish , and take really good care of it. OK? Please?

Me: No. I might accidentally vacuum it out of the tank when I'm cleaning.

Holden: Well, I could take it out of the tank and hold it and keep it safe.

Me: Well, I might think you already took it out of the tank but really you might have just spent 3 hours in the bathroom combing your hair and I'll just think you took it out of the tank but you didn't and I'll start cleaning the snake tank and I'll suck the snake right into the vacuum hose and then you'd be sad.

Holden: Well I could make special holes on the side of the tank that the snake can't get through and you could vacuum through the holes and you won't be able to get the snake.

Me: No, because I'll forget about the special holes and I'll just stick the vacuum in there and then I'll vacuum the snake. Honey, its just not a good idea to let me be around snakes.

Holden: NO FAIR! You always have to vacuum EVERYTHING!